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Chris Efessiou

Chris Efessiou

About Chris Efessiou:  Chris Efessiou is an entrepreneur, business leader, educator, mentor, international speaker, radio show host, and best-selling author of CDO Chief Daddy Officer: The Business of Fatherhood  based on his own experience from raising his daughter as a single dad by applying his business knowledge to the business of parenting.  Listen to Chris’s weekly Radio Show Straight Up With Chris:  Real Talk on Business and Parenthood on Voice America Radio.  You may connect with Chris on Facebook, follow on Twitter and visit www.ChrisEfessiou.com

 

September 25: Chris Efessiou speaks to Networking Executive Women on "How to Get What You Want: The Art of Negotiation"

 

 

November 18: Chris Efessiou speaks to recovering Afghanistan Veterans at Walter Reed Military Medical Center, Bethesda, Maryland

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Just Don’t Become a Dance Mom" by Chris Efessiou

dance-moms-2
When I was 5, my grandfather who was a general contractor wanted me to be an architect. When I was 7, he told me that I needed to become a civil engineer. At age 10, I announced that I was going to become a bishop but ended up removing my hat from consideration when as a tween I realized that bishops had to be celibate. No thank you, not for me.
At about that time my father, a medical equipment manufacturer, wanted me to be a doctor and my grandfather was still pushing hard for the civil engineering gig. I didn't even know what an architect was, and when I asked I was told that he is the man who builds houses. "Then what is a builder grandpa?" I asked, but received no good answer. I didn't even bother asking him what a civil engineer was, resolving that it was probably an engineer who was polite. Wrong, but not for me just the same.

The point is, nobody bothered to ask me anything about what I wanted, or what I was good at, or what I had an inclination for, or what I gave a damn about. Sure, I thought I wanted to be a bishop (not just a priest,) and I was attracted to it because I liked church, the bishop was the head of it, he wore impressive robes and vestments, a crown and a staff, and had lots of people trailing him, and paying attention to him. In other words, it was all about the bling and the hoopla. Somebody should have noticed that and given up on the architect or engineer thing.

What I'm trying to say here is that we, as parents, want to guide our children to make correct choices but, all too often instead of mentoring them we drive them to the decision we want them to make, often with little or no explanation. While we must set specific short term goals for our children, we must make a plan for them that recognizes and respects their individual interests and strengths. Some of the parents who seem the most devoted to their children’s success actually fail to take this important step. The issue is the underlying motivation, when parents are trying to live vicariously through their children. What appears to be devotion is actually selfish and potentially damaging to their children. The real challenge is to cultivate qualities in a child that feel difficult to develop in oneself.

So when in doubt, listen to your child's verbal and non-verbal cues, observe her strengths and weakness, likes and dislikes, sense the type of flame that burns in her gut, and guide her to life's journey in a loving, selfless, and pragmatic way. Remember, it is OK to want your little princess to become a great dancer as long as you never become a Dance Mom!

This is my opinion. It worked for me and it can work for you. You just have to try it!


 

About Chris Efessiou: Chris Efessiou is an Entrepreneur, Leadership Expert, Marketing Strategist, Negotiations Architect, Top 100 Leadership Expert to Follow on Twitter, Educator, Mentor, International Speaker, Radio Show Host, and best-selling author of  CDO Chief Daddy Officer: The Business of Fatherhood based on his own experience from raising his daughter as a single dad by applying his business knowledge to the business of parenting. For more information visit www.ChrisEfessiou.com, connect with Chris on Facebook, follow on Twitter and listen to his radio show Straight Up with Chris: Real Talk on Business and Parenthood Thursdays at 6:00 PM Eastern – 3:00 PM Pacific on Voice America Internet Radio

Thursday, 19 September 2013 18:42

Just Don’t Become a Dance Mom

dance-moms-2
When I was 5, my grandfather who was a general contractor wanted me to be an architect. When I was 7, he told me that I needed to become a civil engineer. At age 10, I announced that I was going to become a bishop but ended up removing my hat from consideration when as a tween I realized that bishops had to be celibate. No thank you, not for me.
At about that time my father, a medical equipment manufacturer, wanted me to be a doctor and my grandfather was still pushing hard for the civil engineering gig. I didn't even know what an architect was, and when I asked I was told that he is the man who builds houses. "Then what is a builder grandpa?" I asked, but received no good answer. I didn't even bother asking him what a civil engineer was, resolving that it was probably an engineer who was polite. Wrong, but not for me just the same.

BlakelyListen Now "Work-Life Challenges - Finding Success as Women" with Susan Blakely, Esq. (9.19.13)

Susan Smith Blakely, Esquire, is a nationally-recognized author, speaker and consultant on issues related to women lawyers and law students. She is the author of Best Friends at the Bar: What Women Need to Know about a Career in the Law (Wolters Kluwer/Aspen Publishers 2009), and her new book on the work-life struggle for women lawyers, Best Friends at the Bar: The New Balance for Today's Woman Lawyer, was released by Wolters Kluwer Law & Business in July 2012. She has more than 25 years of experience in public service and private practice at all levels, including associate, counsel and partner. Ms. Blakely is a graduate with distinction from the University of Wisconsin and from Georgetown University Law Center where she was a teaching fellow. Please visit Susan's website www.bestfriendsatthebar.com


"Back to School Butterflies?" by Chris Efessiou

So, now that a new school year has just started, how do you feel? Yes, I am talking to you Moms and Dads. Are you happy that your kid is finally out of your hair for the next nine months, more or less, or do you feel a sense of loss and perhaps some nervousness as to how your child will weather the new beginning. Whatever your reaction, happy, nervous, concerned, or a mix of the above, it is normal. In my case, the story always ended with "I waved back, got in my car, and wiped off tears."

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My daughter started first grade in 1993, but the mental pictures are still fresh. I still recall how "off" she was on the eve of the first day at school. She was moody, fidgety, and uncharacteristically inattentive. As many times as her mother and I asked her if she were OK, she answered in the affirmative but fooled no one. "Why don't you and daddy go for an ice cream" I said, and the two of us got in the car and drove off. She was expecting me to ask questions but I didn't. I waited until she was licking an ice cream cone and after its magical healing powers had taken hold, I said "You know, I remember I was pretty nervous my first day of school. I didn't think the other kids were going to like me." The floodgates opened, and her concerns of the same started pouring out. All was resolved for her after 20 min of talking, but her concerns now became mine. Will she like the new school, the new teacher, will she make new friends easily? Will she thrive? Now, I was in deep thought. The next day we dropped her off at school. I was dreading the send-off and had the answer ready if she asked to go home right then. We walked her in class, shook hands with the teacher, dropped her backpack on the desk, and waved adieu without the slightest concern. I waved back, got in my car, and wiped off tears.

It happened again in 2001 as a freshman in High School and in 2005 as a freshman in college. Different circumstances, different stages of maturity, different factors at play but, on constant concern. Will my girl be happy, will she like the new environment, take roots in her student community, and thrive? I left each first day of school with a heavy heart and mist in my eyes. It wasn't until years later that I understood the cause of my anxiety. While in part it had to do with concerns of the new environment and its likely challenges, it had far more to do with me not wanting to let her go, not wanting to come to grips with the fact that my baby girl was growing up and could do just fine without my constant oversight. And fine she did!

So, if similar thoughts and concerns are going through your minds as the new school year begins, be the best parent you can be and know that your kids will do fine, and so will you.

This is my opinion. It worked for me and it can work for you. You just have to try it!.



 

About Chris Efessiou: Chris Efessiou is an Entrepreneur, Leadership Expert, Marketing Strategist, Negotiations Architect, Top 100 Leadership Expert to Follow on Twitter, Educator, Mentor, International Speaker, Radio Show Host, and best-selling author of  CDO Chief Daddy Officer: The Business of Fatherhood based on his own experience from raising his daughter as a single dad by applying his business knowledge to the business of parenting. For more information visit www.ChrisEfessiou.com, connect with Chris on Facebook, follow on Twitter and listen to his radio show Straight Up with Chris: Real Talk on Business and Parenthood Thursdays at 6:00 PM Eastern – 3:00 PM Pacific on Voice America Internet Radio

 

Thursday, 05 September 2013 20:45

Back to School Butterflies?

So, now that a new school year has just started, how do you feel? Yes, I am talking to you Moms and Dads. Are you happy that your kid is finally out of your hair for the next nine months, more or less, or do you feel a sense of loss and perhaps some nervousness as to how your child will weather the new beginning. Whatever your reaction, happy, nervous, concerned, or a mix of the above, it is normal. In my case, the story always ended with "I waved back, got in my car, and wiped off tears."

TedRubinListen Now "5 Things Businesses get Wrong on Social Media" with Ted Rubin (9.12.13)

Ted Rubin is a leading Social Marketing Strategist and Keynote Speaker. In March 2009 he started using and evangelizing the term ROR, Return on Relationship, hashtag #RonR. Many people in the social media world know Ted for his enthusiastic, energetic and undeniably personal connection to people. Ted is the most followed CMO on Twitter according to Social Media Marketing Magazine; one of the most interesting CMOs on Twitter according to Say Media, and #13 on Forbes Top 50 Social Media Power Influencers, 2013, and number #2 on the Leadtail August 2013 list of Top 25 People Most Mentioned by Digital Marketers. ROR is the basis of his philosophy…It’s All About Relationships! His book, Return on Relationship was released January 29th. Connect with Ted... http://TedRubin.com or @TedRubin.



"Celebrating 37 Years in the Land of Opportunity" by Chris Efessiou

August 27, 1976, seems so long ago but it feels like yesterday. It was on that day that I took my first steps on American soil at JFK airport determined to make a life on my own.  I had left my loving family in Greece to join a host family in the Boston area as an exchange student, in search of a future that I hoped I'd have a hand in influencing instead of accepting what was served to me by the status quo.  So without language skills, or knowledge of people or culture, I set out to prove to myself that I could.


summer-1978From then on my story is not unlike from that of millions of immigrants who chose to leave the comfort of home, familiar surroundings and support systems in search of the American Dream, nor different from every young person’s brave first steps out along that quivering, indefinite, yet ultimately rewarding wire of risk.

That August day 37 years ago, marked the beginning of the ride of a lifetime and I’ve since celebrated this day as my second birthday.  Much like a baby’s arrival to this world marks the opportunity for its parents to raise a happy, well-adjusted, confident, unentitled adult, my arrival to this country gave me the chance to do anything I was creative enough to dream, daring enough to risk, and disciplined enough to lead myself to my goal.  It gave me the opportunity to become my own person, the opportunity to become Persephone’s father, Juliana’s husband, the employer of more than 1,000 people, a mentor to many, and the leader of myself and those who believe in what I hold dear; respect for self and others, ethics, integrity, team spirit, performance toward the common goal, and actionable compassion for those less fortunate.

In the past 37 years I’ve lived a productive, satisfying life.  Sure I worked for it.  Yes, there were challenges but, there were many more opportunities; opportunities that would have never come my way had I not chosen to make this country my home.

I believed then and I believe today, that America gave me everything and nothing at all.  It gave me no special treatment, no easy passes, no entitlements but, it gave me everything by allowing me to partake in the same opportunities available to everyone else, and that isn’t something that can be found in too many places on this planet.

As I reflect and celebrate the last 37 years, I am humbled and I feel blessed beyond words for the life I've been able to lead in this country of ours, and look forward to the future because I know that my best days, and those of this land, are yet to come.



 

About Chris Efessiou: Chris Efessiou is an Entrepreneur, Leadership Expert, Marketing Strategist, Negotiations Architect, Top 100 Leadership Expert to Follow on Twitter, Educator, Mentor, International Speaker, Radio Show Host, and best-selling author of  CDO Chief Daddy Officer: The Business of Fatherhood based on his own experience from raising his daughter as a single dad by applying his business knowledge to the business of parenting. For more information visit www.ChrisEfessiou.com, connect with Chris on Facebook, follow on Twitter and listen to his radio show Straight Up with Chris: Real Talk on Business and Parenthood Thursdays at 6:00 PM Eastern – 3:00 PM Pacific on Voice America Internet Radio

August 27, 1976, seems so long ago but it feels like yesterday. It was on that day that I took my first steps on American soil at JFK airport determined to make a life on my own.  I had left my loving family in Greece to join a host family in the Boston area as an exchange student, in search of a future that I hoped I'd have a hand in influencing instead of accepting what was served to me by the status quo.  So without language skills, or knowledge of people or culture, I set out to prove to myself that I could.

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